Charlotte is 3 months!

I can't believe my baby girl is 3 months old! Well, technically she was yesterday. I snapped this picture last night. She is absolutely amazing and we love her more everyday. I wanted to do this with each month milestone, but I haven't been able to find time thus far.

Here's what's going on with my girl:

*She has found her hands and LOVES them.
*loves opening and closing her hands and reaching out to grab stuff (especially mommy's hair!)
*has no use for laying down. If you put her flat on her back, she gets seriously torked off and tries to sit herself up. If you put her at a 45 degree angle, she can pull herself on up to a 90 degree angle.
*has started to try to hold her own bottle and can for a minute or so.
* still drinking mostly breastmilk, but we've recently started supplementing with formula.
*Started an 8:30 bedtime on Sunday 3/6/11
*giggles when mommy and daddy make funny noises
*has a smile that can melt any heart
*loves to be held and walking around
*LOVES being read to. I've never seen a baby who pays attention so closely to the pages in a book
*intently watches the colors on the TV
*is 12 lbs 7oz and 24.75 inches long
*"toots" like a grown man...seriously some foul smelling stuff coming out of a sweet little girl
*is starting to like headbands for a short period of time


We love you, Charlotte Baby! We can't wait to watch you over the next few months, but feel free to slow down! Time is going so fast! Never forget we love you more than anything! Love you Boogs!

Coming Home

We got to bring our little monkey home on Thursday, December 9th. Here are some pictures of her with mommy, daddy, and our little family of 3!!

If i can get a certain little girl to snuggle with her daddy tonight, I'll try to blog Christtmas and her 1st time meeting everyone.

Introducing Charlotte Jenice

This is a little late, but better late than never. I've not actually found a free moment to sit down and type out Charlotte's birth story. But obviously, this blog is for documenting our lives and her birth is a very HUGE addition to that life! For those of you who have already heard or read the story on FB and either seen pics on there or seen her in real life...please feel free to ignore this month late post!

So we went to the doctor on December 3rd, 2010 and Dr. Tobler told us that we would be coming in on Tuesday the 7th for an induction. He was going out of town and with my history he was afraid of letting me go past my due date on the 11th. We drove home anxious and filled with anticipation of meeting our daughter. I'm pretty sure I didn't sleep at all Monday night. We had to be at the hospital at 6:30 on Tuesday. So we got up, earlier than necessary, bags packed and ready to go. Then I decided that we needed to take a picture of the 2 of us before we became a family of 3. Well, that meant unpacking the camera and trying to figure out the self-time on the camera. Here is the result- Our last picture before we were parents!



When we first got there the nurses were getting ready for shift change. We were able to get settled in and I changed into my lovely gown. My loving husband snapped this picture

Dr. T came in and decided to get the Pitocin started at 9 am. My contractions started to kick in pretty quickly, but they weren't showing up on the monitor. I was really starting to feel them, but unfortunately, nothing was happening as far as dilation. Time ticked away. Mom and Trenton kept me entertained and I tried to rest (yeah right). At 1:30, Dr. T came in to check on me before heading to the Lancaster clinic and decided to go ahead and break my water.

After that, whoa baby, things felt like they were really picking up. For some reason, I was really feeling things, but nothing was changing. The contractions were coming, but I wasn't dilating very fast. The nurse checked me again and I was between a 3-4. I was hurting pretty bad and they thought that might be slowing things down, so I asked for an epidural. After they administered that, they upped the pit hoping to get things moving, which it did. Unfortunately, the epidural didn't take. AT ALL! So they decided to do an inner-thecal (spelling), which was supposed to last 3 hours. It lasted a whole hour. Dr. T checked back in and I was at a 5. I was in so much pain!!! I told Trenton I wanted to quit and that I couldn't take any more. Dr. T decided we could re-administer the epidural if I wanted....which at that point, I gladly wanted. Turns out I have slight case of scoliosis (spelling) that blocked it the first time. It took the anesiaologist awhile to get back to the hospital. At about 9:45 she did the 2nd epidural and it started working immediately. Dr. T had headed home and was going to check back in later since I had only been at a 5 a few hours earlier. When the nurse checked me directly following the administration of the epidural, I was complete. THe nurse called the doctor right back in and we started getting ready to push. It was amazing and I've never felt more powerful in all my life. He ended up cutting me because I was tearing because her head was pretty big. I ended up with 2nd degree tearing, but other than that, it was a picture perfect delivery.

Charlotte Jenice arrived at 11:02 pm on December 7th. She weighed 8lbs 11.8oz and was 22 inches long. She is absolutely perfect and we're head over heels in love!

Enjoy the pictures!

Dear Little Miss

My sweet girl,

I cannot begin to put into words all the thoughts on my heart this morning. Your dad and I are beyond excited to finally meet you. I wonder who you'll look like and if you'll be a sleepyhead like both of us. I can't believe that in less than 36 hrs (hopefully) we'll have all the answers to those questions. Will you have any hair, will your eyes sparkle blue, how much will you weigh...etc.

We've cried so many tears, praying that one day we'd be blessed with a baby. Praying each night together that we'd get to be parents. And now, sweet girl, you'll soon be ours, and every tear will be worth a million more.

Please come soon....we're ready.

D-Day

Well, in case you haven't heard...tomorrow is the day. I'll be arriving at the hospital at 6:30 am to be induced on Tuesday! We're excited, nervous, and scared all at once!

We had an appt on Friday and I was dilated 1-2 cm & 100% effaced at that time. I was really hoping something would happen this weekend on its own, but alas, here I sit at work still. I haven't slept for 2 nights, mostly nerves I think. So I'm heading home at 1/2 day to rest for a little bit because I'm sure I won't sleep tonight and I'll need my energy tomorrow.

I can't wrap my mind around the fact that in 36 hrs (give or take) we'll be holding our sweet girl in our arms. What an answered prayer! I'll try to post a new blog when possible, but you'll likely catch a better update on Facebook!

Belly Pics finally

Here are a few updated photos. Ignore the towel on the head and no makeup...I can see a slight difference finally this week and notice that the belly is more rounded and the orange sweater makes me look like a giant pumpkin, but it's soft and comfy!

2 weeks to go!

38 weeks



Collage of the past few months

update coming soon

I promise to update soon with pictures. I'm hoping that we finish up the nursery decorations tonight and putting stuff away so I might actually be able to post those pictures along with an updated belly shot. Pretty much if you've been to SeaWorld....well, that's a good vision on what I feel like right now. I've had dozens of people comment on how tiny I am for 37 weeks, so I guess I should feel blessed to not have one of those watermelon bellies and feet that look sausages! Overall, though, really, things are going fabulously and we're just buying time until Little Miss decides to be an arrival. Friends of Trenton's just had their little girl a week late today and another friend is having her little boy a month early today, so I'm not going to try to out guess her at all....She'll be here whenever she (or the doctor) decides!

This is normal, right?

I think I'm starting to freak out a little bit about the whole almost there thing. Do you see that countdown on the right? It says 46 days. Give or take a few. That is impossible.

I lay awake at night thinking things like, what if the name we have picked out doesn't sound right? Should we change it? What if I can't breastfeed, do I have a formula on hand for back up? If so, what one? Will she be warm enough in the pram that I have for a winter coat? What if we get snowed/stuck in the house and I need something for her? What if we're simply just not good at being parents? What if that maternal instinct, doesn't kick in for me? People keep asking me what kind of diapers and wipes I want...I don't know, I don't have a baby to try them on yet. I know this kind works for you, but what if it gives my girl a rash. So I just say, you pick and we'll hope for the best. I'm trying to be laid back about figuring things out as we go, but the more questions people ask me about things I don't know yet, the more I'm starting to feel like the kid that needs the cheat sheet to pass the test. I'm open for all kinds advice.

Then I think about other stupid stuff, like "Trenton, yes, I know it's 3:15 in the morning, but do you think James would come look at the light in the basement and why it won't work?" OR " I really want to get that spare bed set up in the basement tomorrow". Granted, most nights, I've refrained from waking him up and just lay there with my mental list until morning. I feel like I'm becoming the grouchy pregnant lady because I'm not sleeping and other people's demands just put more pressure on the never-ending list of things I feel like I need to get done first. I'm feeling the pressure of the whole holiday schedule and be here at this time and there at that time and so and so wants to have Thanksgiving on this day. I know part of that is the unknown of when she will come, so I don't feel like we have any 100% definite plan of how our time will be spent from Thanksgiving to Christmas. If she's 2 weeks early, hello Thanksgiving. If she's 2 weeks late, Merry Christmas! I just feel like saying, "yeah, about that, we'll be there if we can, but if not, Happy Holidays!"

Tell me this is all normal. Tell me that it's a temporary thing because the time is getting so close. I just can't help but feel that we've waited so long for this, but at the same time, I know our WHOLE lives are going to change. What if we aren't as ready for that change as we thought. My husband appears to be Mr. Calm and Cool. He just keeps telling me, we're adaptable, we're flexible, we can handle it. I know he's right, but someone needs to send my brain that memo at 3:00 am when it's making yet another to do list.

32 weeks

I'm a little late on the pictures this week as Saturday was technically 32 and I'm closer to 33 now. But the picture was taken on Monday, so I guess close counts right? Our appt went well last week and we'll go again next Friday. I will be doing non-stress tests to monitor her just because Dr. T wants to make sure she's doing ok. Blood pressure continues to be excellent and I actually lost a couple pounds after the previous pile on! Overall, we're getting very VERY excited!

The lovely and thoughtful BUNCO babes surprised me with a shower at our October Bunco and it was fantastic (especially since it was already at my house, which meant I didn't have to pack things home!!) I promise to get pictures from Jenn of our gifts! We were very humbled by the graciousness of our friends and already feel the overwhelming love for our Little Miss.

This is not the most flattering of pictures. Please excuse no makeup and the fact that I hadn't really combed my hair yet. I bought that sweater over the weekend and was totally digging it....then I put it on Monday morning, wore it for about 5 minutes and changed not too long after taking the picture. My belly is still mostly just 2 fat rolls sticking farther and farther out, but whatever, it is what it is and fat rolls or not, there's a healthy little girl inside!



And as a comparison

30 wks

Well, we had our last monthly appt on Friday, October 1st. Everything seems to be going just swimmingly. My blood pressure continues to be good, running on the low side. The only problem with that has been episodes of lightheadedness, but nothing major. I am having SEVERE leg cramps and restless legs. Dr. Tobler suggested that I start taking a magnesium supplement to see if we could relieve some of the pain. Not only do they hurt super bad, but they are also causing me to loose quite a bit of sleep.

We will start our bi-weekly appts on the 15th. It doesn't seem possible that will be our 32 wk appt. We will have another ultrasound that day because he wants to check my fluid level and her measurements as I was measuring between 31 1/2- 32 wks at the 30 wks checkup. Nothing major, I'm sure, but it definitely explains why I feel huge, my pants don't fit, and I've gained more weight in a month than I had altogether! I'm excited to see her again and am hoping this will relieve some of the burning desire to get her here!

I'm starting to get to the uncomfortable stage. Mostly at night. Sleep seems to allude me most nights, but I'm able to catch a few naps during the week to keep up. We have the nursery ready other than hanging stuff on the walls and curtains. I can't find dark wooden curtain rods anywhere! I had curtains bought, but they were the wrong size! One wall will have her name on it, so it will be blank until she gets here. I'm starting to get very anxious about bringing a new baby home in the midst of the holiday chaos. It's hard to plan the holidays not knowing when exactly she will make her debut!

Here's a few pictures of my expanding belly. I'll save you the nightmare of a bare belly and keep it covered for public viewing!

This was 9/15 at approximately 27 1/2 weeks.


and this is today at approximately 30 1/2 wks.



Side by side comparison. Not much change so far, just a lot of fluff!

can't stand the cuteness

I wasn't going to get caught up in the ridiculousness of buying cutesy novelty stuff for a girl that's gonna grow like a weed....but I'm afraid my daughter is going to need a pair of these...or two...

Double Digits

99.....that's how many days until my due date! I never thought it would get here. It's odd. At first we were counting how many days we'd been pregnant. 5w4d, 8w2d...14w2d was 100 days of being pregnant. Now here we are at 99 days left until we get to meet her and we've started counting down. What a strange turn of events. 26 weeks tomorrow. I feel like my belly actually looks pregnant instead of just fat, so maybe I'll start some belly pics even though most of you see me frequently....


99...wow...

Catch up

I had great intentions of blog journaling throughout this pregnancy and documenting all the milestones...and that hasn't happened. I'm gonna do a little catch up and pray that now that school is back in full swing, I can update a little more these next three months!



This is our sweet baby girl! We went on July 19th for an u/s and were told that they "thought" it was a girl. We were both over the moon, but were hoping for a 100% shot so we could start planning. We were a little disappointed with the tech and by the fact that we didn't get a 3-d u/s. But, we went for our monthly doctor appt on my birthday, July 27th. Everything was going great, however, the u/s showed that my amniotic fluid was low, which was the reason they couldn't do the 3-d. He wanted to check my fluid level again and ordered another u/s.

So we went back on August 4th at 21weeks 4days and were able to see clearly that she is definitely a girl! She was moving to much to get any real clear pictures, but the tech was able to capture the one above of her face. She has her mouth wide open and was getting ready to put her hand in there. I was amazed and fascinated that she looks like a real little person. I cried and laughed and giggled at her silly movements. She would grab at her feet, then put her hands over her face, put her fingers up her nose, etc. Quite the personality already I would say!

Things have been progressing well and the time is ticking quickly. I'm beyond excited for her to get here and be able to hold her, but at the same time there is so much to do! And I'm starting to freak out about actually being competent enough to care for her.

We had our August monthly appt yesterday. All external measurements are right on. And even though I can't fit into a single pair of pants, I've only gained a little over 9 lbs. Her heart was just a beating away. I passed my 3 hr. glucose tolerance test with flying colors and my blood pressure is actually staying on the rather low side at 93/60. I haven't had any major swelling issues other than my fingers overnight, but they usually go down by mid-morning.

We're working on the nursery and I am hoping to have it all ready to go by the October Bunco date to show off! We decided on the bed set we already had from Vicki that is Osh Kosh Patchwork Stars. It's cute, country, and rustic. I think it will be fabulous. I have a picture in my head, but never execute the look the way I envision! We're supposed to move the rest of the furniture in the nursery tonight and will hopefully be getting the crib soon. My sisters have set a date for my shower for October 30th, and I have to admit, I'm crazy excited!

We have a name picked out, but are opting to keep it a secret. Trenton & I call her that when it's just us, and it's getting harder and harder to not "slip" in public. I fretted about names for so long, but after we saw her face, I just knew we'd found the perfect name. I can't imagine her being anything else.

I think that's the last few months in a nutshell. Month 6 starts soon, so maybe I'll be able to post a little more frequently from here on out!

Dear Baby...

Dear Baby,

Will you ever know just how much you are wanted? I'm feeling quite sentimental this morning. Reflecting on the long road we have traveled waiting for you to come into our lives. I know we still have several months before we meet, but I wonder if we'll ever be able to show you just how loved and wanted you are? So many prayers have been sent to God for you, so many tears cried, and dreams dreamed. Can you feel that love? Do you already know how badly we long to hold you in our arms? Oh, the dreams I have for you. To be happy and healthy. To be generous and giving. To have a tender heart like your mom and a know no stranger personality like your dad. To know the meaning of hard work and earning what you have. In a little over a week, we will know if you are coming to us as a beautiful little girl or a handsome little boy. Several people have asked us which we'd prefer. I just want you to know right now, that either way, you will be perfect to us. Boy or girl, we don't care, as long as you are ours in a few more months. With 10 little fingers and 10 little toes. Stay snugged in tight and keep growing for now sweet baby and we'll keep praying for you out here!

Dear Baby,


Although I cannot see you,

I still know you are there.

You are warm and snug inside me,

and require gentle care.



Although I cannot hold you,

or give you a hug goodnight.

I feel you move inside me

and know that you are alright.



Although I cannot kiss you,

or show you how I feel.

I know you share my feelings

and that our bond is real.



.....you are with me all the time

and always on my mind.

Already I have fallen in love

with my precious gift from up above.

I hear it only gets worse...???

So this whole "pregnancy brain" thing. I always that it was somewhat of a "myth". Until, I forgot to make my husband's truck payment, I went to work with 2 non-matching flip flops, and several other crazy things that have come out of my mouth. For instance, on Saturday, we decided to lay down for a bit and rest. I had already fallen asleep on the couch for a few minutes, so we just moved in to the bed. Trenton was watching the soccer game and I was slipping into nap time. I was only half listening to the announcer on TV and in my defense still kinda in that sleep state. I swear the announcer said, "if this team wants to win, they're really going to need testicle keepers"......

Now what they really said, was " if this team wants to win, they're really going to need to test the goal keeper". I sat up in bed and asked Trenton if I heard what I thought I did. Of course, he bust into hysterical laughter and has been teasing me about "testicle keepers" every since.

They tell me this whole fuzzy brained thinking gets worse? If that's true, I'm not sure what kinda shape I'll be in come December.

16 week appt

Kinda of a repeat from FB. But I wanted to jot down the info from today's appt for journaling purposes!

We had our June appt today. HB 150. My blood pressure is excellent and I only gained a pound since last month, which I contribute to the heavy pants I have on instead of the capris I wore last month. I will be discontinuing the glucophage that we were taking, but have a dietary consult to follow a diabetic diet. He feels more comfortable taking a natural approach to the insulin issues instead of continuing the meds at this point. He's not labeling me with gestational diabetes, but said I am at a higher risk because of my need for the glucophage prior to getting pregnant. I'll do bi-weekly blood sugar checks and hopefully keep things in check from there. If the diet isn't regulating it enough, we'll turn to insulin shots. In all honesty, it's going to be hard work, but I would much rather be a little stricter about what I'm eating and balancing my diet than I would give myself shots everyday :( boo! I'm grateful though that my cravings so far have been for whole foods & fruits/veggies. Carbs have already been a total turn off for me, so I feel like we've altered our diet already because of that. I'm not at the point where I have to totally go all out hard core, but prevention is the key!

We will go JULY 19th for our gender scan!!!!! I'm so excited! That's only a little under 3 weeks away! I had hoped to wait until my bday on July 27th for the gender scan just because I thought that would make it extra special, but he wants to see us in office that week and wants the u/s done earlier than that. So, aww shucks, we have to find out sooner! I just hate that! I know these next few weeks will drag on because we're looking forward to it so much.

I have moments of panic about actually having a baby and bringing it home. I think I just got to the mindset that I wasn't really sure we would ever actually get to that stage. We were very confident in our decision to start a family, but after having so much trouble, you put the family thought to the back burner and your primary concern becomes just getting to that positive test and making it stick then the rest will come later. I feel like the later might actually happen for us now...and oh boy, is it scary! And exciting. And breath-taking to think that in less than six months, our little family of 2 will be a family of 3 and all those dreams I've dreamed about holding a chubby cheeked little one in my arms, won't just be of holding other people's babies. I've always dreamed of nursery themes and baby names, but having a little person inside that will actually get to have that name, or sleep in that crib, or snuggle in that blanket changes everything. It's so amazing when you realize that your dreams are actually becoming your reality....and you know it's going to change your whole life forever....

A little late...but still

Trenton & I have been keeping a very big secret until recently. We found out on Easter Sunday that we were expecting. I asked God for a sign that day that things would be ok...15 minutes later, this was in the sky...



So we waited...and waited...and had blood drawn and more blood. And finally at 6W3D we were able to see this...



We had a fabulous u/s tech, who zoomed in for a heartbeat right away and found one beating at a perfect 111. We were measuring at 6W1D- so right on target for the most part. I was so surprised that she let us see the screen right away because usually they do their thing first, but she said as bad as I was shaking she could tell we were very NERVOUS and wanted to put us at ease. I burst into tears at the sound of that beautiful noise and didn't stop crying the whole time!

At this point, we were having none of the problems we had previously had. The u/s looked great and the doctor made an appt for a little over 5 weeks later. May 29th felt like it would NEVER get here. I was so nervous and anxious I seriously thought I was going to lose my mind. In the meantime, between driving my husband crazy over every single little twinge and pull, I started to have morning sickness...and afternoon sickness...and evening sickness. Not horribly bad, but enough where I was definitely ill 3/4 of the time. As the school year was wrapping up, my brain had completely shut down. Laundry and cooking dinner were replaced by 2-3 hour naps and this gal was in bed by 8-9 pm. I had never experienced any of this with the other pregnancies, so we were hoping this was a positive sign. To try and explain the emotions that we went through in those 5 weeks, would be impossible. I have never prayed so hard in my entire life. Mostly, we just prayed for God's will and for us to be at peace no matter the outcome. We wanted to shout it from the rooftops, but at the same time, we were so apprehensive that something would go wrong, we just couldn't say anything.

May 29th finally arrived. I went fairly confident into this u/s. Why I'm not sure, but I just felt like things were going to be ok. And this is what we saw...



A baby...a real life baby with a HB of 157 and 10 fingers and 10 toes and absolutely amazing. He/she was not a fan of the doppler and kept doing flips and what not to get away from the sound the tech said. It was the most astounding sight I've ever seen....

We decided to wait until after Kayla's graduation to make our announcement to my side, which was on Sunday. On Friday night, we told his mom and told his dad on Saturday morning. I broke down and told Jamie and Kayla on Saturday morning over muffins and coffee after a girls' morning at Farmer's Market. Kayla said it was silly for us to wait and to go ahead and share. We still thought we should hold off until after her party Saturday night. After the party was cleaned up, we all went back to mom and David's and we broke the news then. It's kinda just spread by word of mouth and of course, Facebook. We're crazy excited and hope that come December 11th...or close to it, we'll be holding Baby T in our arms!

Happy Anniversary!

I love this pic! They are two of the best parents anyone could ask for! They celebrated 12 years together yesterday. I'm a bad daughter and forgot to wish them Happy Anniversary until they reminded me...but in all fairness, I had remembered, just ask Trenton. I had just forgotten to tell them in the chaos of the funeral.

Today....

I'm sad. I have a lot to be celebrating right now. I really do. Spring is alive all around us and the darkness of winter has passed leaving bright colors, crisp air, and beautiful babies everywhere. But I'm sad because today, I should be celebrating a 1st birthday. One year ago today is the day that our baby from the very first pregnancy should have been born. We have milestones from the other two miscarriages that I remember, but none hit me like this day has the last 2 years. I don't know if it's because we saw a heartbeat with this little one or if it's just that it was the first so I was naive and had already began dreaming of the life this little one would lead. With the 2nd and 3rd, we were so jaded that we didn't even let ourselves be excited or dream. I know we will be celebrating again soon. Believe me, I know! But for today, I'm going to be a little sad.

Also, please keep my Papa John in your prayers. I just got word this morning that my Grandma Maridee passed away in her sleep last night. I say Papa & Grandma, but they are technically my aunt and uncle. Papa John is my dad's brother, but because of the age difference in my parents most of my aunts and uncles are more grandparent age. Papa John just recently found out he has cancer and I'm afraid this will be too much for him to handle. They were such a big part of my childhood and it's hard too accept that one of them is gone and the other one is very ill.They lived over the hill from us and I fondly remember several days & evenings spent at their house. Of 12 children in my dad's family, only 2 aunts and 2 uncles remain. Sometimes, I feel like my link to my dad is slowly dying and fading away. I know I have cousins to help relive memories, but again they are all older and have different memories than I do, because by the time I was born, they were all grown with children of their own.

Sorry to be such a downer today.....on the plus side, it's Earth Day and we're picking up trash today....yippee!!!

Puppies

This post is for Jenn. Just wanted to show that they don't look like little rats anymore. I think they are quite adorable! I've become quite smitten with the little punks. They're probably the most feisty bunch we've had yet. They've got attitude!